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Voices In My Mind

Posted By on February 2, 2010


It’s this all knowing voice in my mind which constantly measures my every new thought or idea. I can’t tell it what to do. It seems to have a life all its own.

It must have always been there, but I didn’t notice the chatter when I was comfortably gliding through life. Most disturbing is its judgment, criticism and doubt. When I tried to turn the voice off it seemed to laugh impossible, just like that?, no way!

So here I was wondering just what this “voice” was doing here, what it wants and where it came from. Obvious it is my own minds way of telling me something but why is it so critical of my every move?

I understand the chatter now, how it automatically appears and even holds us back at times, and it doesn’t mean to cause us any harm. I have since learned how this voice was naturally developed when the merging of memory and logic occurred at my youngest years to help me feel safe. Before memory and logic our only action impulse was the desire to express ourselves in that very moment.

It must have been before memory and logic the day I wanted to cross the street to play with the other girls, but mom said I couldn’t cross without her, yet I casually skipped right on over to play with them anyway. BWmirrorofyourmindWhen memory and logic developed, I would recall that famous mom scolding for not listening. Eventually logic linked with the experience of punishment while the little voice in my mind echoed a reminder of the emotional pain. “There is no way I definitely should not take it upon myself to cross the road and play with those girls.”

Growing up I noticed people weren’t always predictable, even those closest, and I put my trust in the voice. Even though it wasn’t predicting the future, it reminded me of rules from the past assuming a future un-pleasantry in the near future. Now it makes a lot more sense this voice has been conditioned over many years learning and reminding me what to do in order to stay happy. After investing a lot of faith in this voice for reward, acceptance, love and attention I allowed it to assume authority over my choices and trusted it to guide me right.

It helps to explain why this voice has taken on this life all its own, presenting interpretation by its own logical code. The conditioning of my memory becomes triggered and awakened.

The next thing you know, it seems we are here in adulthood mistakenly putting our trust in this chatter which is often outdated and negative.  It’s no wonder we display hang-ups about so many things or nervousness about people’s reactions. This self programmed tool was once useful in childhood but is no longer helping in many areas of our adult lives. Are you wondering what others will think instead of letting go and living fully in the moment without reservation? I know I do it.

Although these voices may seem to really come alive at times of stress I believe they are quietly running in the background and can become roadblocks to our living a joyful, free spirited life.

After reading researched articles, studying myself, observing strangers, friends & family I have come to some conclusion:

  1. It is not going to go away and change right away. The first step is recognizing it.
  2. Develop a plan of positive self talk. Challenge the chatter!
  3. Find the value and the meaning behind observing and challenging this voice.
  4. Get passionate about the possibilities.
  5. See all the positive choices when you free that spirit within.
  6. Be forgiving & kind to yourself. The voice in your mind is not a fault of yours it was naturally developed and served a purpose.
  7. Not everyone is willing to let go of the voice. It has been “a friend” for a long while.
  8. There is a ton of information on the subject of self Talk some good some down-right silly. Ask around if needed research a trained coach.

Unfortunately, the internet is loaded with all the latest tips and tricks that appear to help you in all of your quests for improvement. I say unfortunately because (similar to above) these lists are polite, practical and often ineffective. They are calm and rational in the face of screaming insecurity. None of them will work for you when you are not serious about actually defeating the challenge before you. It’s easy and comfortable to procrastinate. It’s safe.

If you are truly about embracing change find something IMPORTANT that is worth enraging your obsolete fears, SO IMPORTANT that yes, you are willing to go through all the obstacles to get it done.

Either that or you could stay where you are but I would choose happy instead.

I would like to encourage you to connect with me, share a comment, interest and any part of this post as you please.

Enjoy Your Day!

Robin

Note:                                                                                                                                                                              Relationships and areas of personal growth have been natural passions of mine for a very long time. Understanding ourselves and the world around us is paramount to living a happy and full life. Although we can never REALLY know what is in another mind, I believe there are areas in personal development which can fuel our own hearts with a greater empathy and compassion for others.

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About the author

Have had the pleasure of working from a home office since 1993 and sure want to keep it that way. It's nice just stepping outside my office to play in the garden or take a hike with my pets when the mood strikes. Many agree, the most rewarding job to have is one we choose make ourselves. Also, spending quality time with some of the greatest Social Media strategists & Blogging buddies. Hands-down some of the greatest teachers (givers) I personally know. Enthusiastic sharing is unusual in some parts! Not this community. Such a very cool blessing :)

Comments

18 Responses to “Voices In My Mind”

  1. Ken Pickard says:

    Robin,

    This is a very insightful post. I can appreciate the information you laid out here. It’s amazing how people can get caught up with chatter in their mind and not get the focus or importance of what your mind is trying to say.

    Ken Pickard
    The Network Dad

    • Robin Lynn Brooks says:

      Thanks so much for your comment Ken. I’m loving that you stopped by my blog! I am a huge fan of yours it is loaded with value :)

  2. Kathy Jodrey says:

    Hey Robin,

    I love the message here, and it never ceases to amaze me when I see something like this at the exact moment that I most need to see (and hear) it. Thank you!

    I grew up with less than excellent self esteem, and those voices have been pestering me for my entire life. I’m so grateful for the life lessons I’ve learned as a result of a quest for personal growth and development.

    Yes, the voices sometimes still say nasty things to me from time to time but I’ve learned that I don’t need to listen to them, and I can defeat them by replacing them with positive self talk. For those who would appreciate help on this I can highly recommend a book called “What to Say When You Talk to Yourself” by Shad Helmstetter.
    .-= Kathy Jodrey´s last blog ..Blog Syndication Made Quick & Simple with OnlyWire =-.

    • Robin Lynn Brooks says:

      Thanks so much Kathy for such a thoughtful comment and adding your book recommendation. It is so appreciated!

  3. Aloha Robin,

    I love this post! Thank you for your transparency and honesty about “your voice” or “the chatter”. You are helping so many with your unconditional sharing!

    I love personal growth too and it took me many, many years to start observing my “little voice” and to notice that there was always one person at every circumstance that I wasn’t happy about and that one person that was at every incident was ME! Once I discovered her, life became so joyful and full of blessings.

    You are such a joy Robin! I look forward to getting to know you. :) :)
    .-= Kellie Hosaka´s last blog ..THE LAW OF ATTRACTION & QUANTUM PHYSICS =-.

    • Robin Lynn Brooks says:

      Kellie how sweet of you to share your own “discovery”! I think it is so true when we give focus to recognizing our own personal growth needs the blessings are “awakened” :)

  4. uberVU - social comments says:

    Social comments and analytics for this post…

    This post was mentioned on Twitter by Michaele_H: Voices In My Mind http://ow.ly/1o13N5 How the internal critic holds us back via @RobinLynnBrooks…

  5. Jennifer Hart says:

    Wonderful post Robin! It’s sometimes easy to stay comfortable and “safe” by listening to that negative self chatter. Mastering the mind definitely takes practice, but it’s worth it to move us forward so we can believe in ourselves and create joy in our life. I do my best to practice daily affirmations. Louise Hay’s DVD “You Can Heal Your Life” was phenomenal support. Thank you for sharing your wisdom.
    .-= Jennifer Hart´s last blog ..Tribe Mastery & Syndication =-.

    • Robin Lynn Brooks says:

      Jennifer, Daily affirmations can be a wonderful tool for empowering the mind. I think it would be cool to have some inspirational poetry to work out to or when hiking or running, too! You’re right it’s all so worth it!

  6. Kimberly Castleberry says:

    Hey Robin, great post! I think all of us have dealt with the internal chatter to one degree or another. Even those that don’t outright consciously hear it can usually hear their mothers warning in their head! One important piece of getting our power back however is to not abstract it. Its not and it! It’s a part of us, its our subconscious ie inner child that completely lacks logic but very much understand fear. It’s a part of us designed to protect us even when we’ve outgrown its fears. Sometimes part of that process is learning to be gentle with ourselves while we grow. Give ourselves the love and patience we would give a child, because we ARE precious. Thanks for sharing this powerful message and great tips!
    .-= Kimberly Castleberry´s last blog ..The Power of Authenticity =-.

    • Robin Lynn Brooks says:

      You are so welcome Kimberly, I love how you mentioned giving ourselves the love & patience we would give a child. People can be so hard on themselves.

  7. Tasha Palmer says:

    “If you are truly about embracing change find something IMPORTANT that is worth enraging your obsolete fears, SO IMPORTANT that yes, you are willing to go through all the obstacles to get it done.” I couldn’t have said it better. I know so many people that say they won’t more and they talk about going after it but they let that voice and fear hold them back every single time. They are scared to change and challenge that voice that has and continues to lead them into destruction and a unsuccessful life.

    I have come to realize that they fear of something going wrong is only in your head. If you believe it won’ t work then you are dummed from the begining. If you believe (truly believe) that you can achieve anything then fear has no worth. It can never hold you back. But you have to first challenge it to see that fear is weak and easily destroyed.

    • Robin Lynn Brooks says:

      I love the way you think Tasha , very powerful and determined :)

      The voices in our minds are ever so personal and very different for each of us and evolve over time as a result of each individuals growth pattern. As you said there is so much power in what we truly believe and the challenge is ours to conquer!

  8. Michael Feil says:

    Robin,

    Great post! You are right on the money here! We all have those voices in our head but we need to weed out what’s good and what’s not. You make some very good points here! Thanks so much for posting!

    Mike
    .-= Michael Feil´s last blog ..Don’t Let This Phrase Destroy Your Business! =-.

  9. Once again Robin…a wonderful post. I’ll pass along your inspiring words from your heart.
    Talk about voices in the head? You should hear mine lol! You put things in perspective. Thanks so much for sharing this wonderful message. Donna

  10. I have struggled with this Robin and am really trying to live more in the moment as you said. Thanks so much for sharing!

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About the author

Have had the pleasure of working from a home office since 1993 and sure want to keep it that way. It's nice just stepping outside my office to play in the garden or take a hike with my pets when the mood strikes. Many agree, the most rewarding job to have is one we choose make ourselves. Also, spending quality time with some of the greatest Social Media strategists & Blogging buddies. Hands-down some of the greatest teachers (givers) I personally know. Enthusiastic sharing is unusual in some parts! Not this community. Such a very cool blessing :)
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